This is a saying that comes up for me over and over again in stillness — “Be Where You Are”
It first tip-toed into my mind seven years ago on a yoga mat and to this day I continue to find new meaning in it.
Being where you are is one of the best ways to squash comparison syndrome, stop judging yourself, and realize happiness is right here waiting for you.
But it hits deeper than you think — so let’s break it down.
Be Where You Are – Presence
This one’s pretty obvious but always important: Be where you are, in this moment and space.
Let your mind sink into the physical sensations of your body. Feel the ground under you, the sensations in your torso and limbs, your breath, notice the way the air smells and feels in your lungs. Fully hear the sounds around you. Be where you are, be present.
Be Where You Are – Skillset/Achievement
This meaning was the most important to me in yoga.
As with so many things, it’s easy to get caught up in comparison mode, focusing on where you want to be and judging your present abilities as inadequate.
This is true for all of our hobbies, jobs, and bodies. Really anything you want to do you probably judge yourself for not being as ____ as you want to be.
Instead of inspiring (and let’s be honest, shaming) you to improve, this mindset actually really holds you back.
Being in opposition to the moment and where you are currently, creates so much friction in our minds and hearts that it makes every activity miserable, greatly increases stress, and distracts us from being able to actually improve.
This doesn’t mean you can’t have goals and dreams. It just helps you focus and stop comparing yourself negatively to others.
And here’s another secret — you’re never gonna be happy where you are, until you’re happy where you are. If you’re unhappy now, achieving your goals will only give you new ones and push your happiness requirement that much further out. So be happy where you are now!
The moment you can allow and embrace your current skillset — to Be Where You Are — the stress and resistance will instantly melt away and you can bend deeper, feel more inspired, and do things more joyfully. You improve faster and most importantly, actually enjoy your life instead of always feeling like you’re behind and waiting to achieve something to be happy.
Be Where You Are – Emotionally
Emotions act the same way — If we resist how we’re feeling we just get stuck.
I’ve learned so many emotional clearing techniques over the years but one that was very impactful for me was the Sedona Method.
I’ll link to it at the end but I’m just going to share the first step with you, which changed everything for me:
— Welcome how you are feeling —
For me, this was revolutionary. I have spent so much of my life resisting the depression, anxiety, and upset I have felt.
But what’s amazing is, if you can welcome how you feel, if you can “be where you are” emotionally, the preverbal noose around your neck and heart loosens and the feelings you’ve been resisting can be embraced and then dissipate into a fine mist.
It’s really quite incredible.
This has been especially useful to me in grieving the loss of my best friend and dog, Luna, these last 6 months. So often at the beginning, I felt numb and sad and unsure what to do. Being where I was emotionally, allowed me to grieve fully and honor the love I have for my sweet girl, without pushing myself to move past it and creating new trauma. I still cry and feel sad whenever I need to, no judgment.
So the biggest caveat with being where you are, is you can’t do it to try to get somewhere else. You have to be – where – you – are.
If you take the action of ALLOWANCE for the purpose of EXCELLING, it’s like you have one hand on your heart and one hand on the thing you’re grasping at. It doesn’t work.
You have to learn to let go with both hands, and fully embrace yourself, how you feel, and where you’re at, just for that act of loving yourself now. Then, and only then, will you feel the release that’s required for growth.
It’s tricky, I know. Sometimes it feels impossible to stop grasping. This too is perfectly okay to feel, so lean into that as well and embrace it.
Be Where You Are — In your body, your skillset, and your emotions.
Doing so will allow you to let go so you can actually enjoy who you are and what you already have.
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Lots of Love!
P.S. Here is that link to the Sedona Method — the emotional clearing technique I love!