How to Fill the Void

Are there things you tell yourself that if you just had, your life would be better? A new house, a loving partner, a new job, a box of kittens?

Do you constantly judge yourself for your shortcomings? Procrastination, a messy house, being a space-case?

Do you find yourself bargaining down an unending train for your happiness? Once I achieve XYZ, then I’ll be happy. Then I can take a break. Then I’ll finally feel successful!

All of these things are examples of feeling lack or “the void”.

It’s a feeling like we’re missing out on something. That something’s just not quite right. And so we go out in search of ways to fill it.

We’re taught and conditioned to believe that there are things we can buy or achieve to fill that hole inside ourselves. That somehow if we just had the right planner, car, organizational skills, that then we would feel okay, whole, complete; OR that it would somehow make us different and better, which would then lead us to feel okay, whole, and complete.

Many of us also use fun compulsive behaviors to fill the ‘not quite right’ itch — shopping, drinking, tv, smoking, video games, etc.

But the thing is, that completeness never comes from the outside. You can throw as many products, achievements, and activities at it as you want and the hole will still be there. Waiting for you.

That’s because, truthfully, the only way to lastingly fill the void is from the inside.

There’s many ways to do this — so many teachers and paths.

But today I’m going to share with you a way I’ve been using for months and it has been changing my life!!!

THE DOUBLE-TROUBLE OF LACK

MOTIVATION

While lack is certainly a motivating, survival emotion, it can also be incredibly paralyzing when you have too much of it. I know many people, including myself, that can get so wrapped up in the feeling of missing things in their life they want, that they fall right into anxiety, depression, and an insanely over-active mind.

I can also tell you from experience though, that when you embody a feeling of fullness instead, it’s actually easier to get things done. The motivation comes on stronger when it’s derived from inspiration and joy, rather than fear or guilt.

LACK ATTRACTS LACK

The other issue lack causes is with manifestation.

The first “rule” of manifestation is “Like attracts like“.

Which means, things of the same frequency are attracted to each other. Which means, if you’re holding your body in a state of lack, then you will only be drawing towards you more situations, people, and things to make you feel more lack.

So if in fact, you would prefer to have, say, a feeling of fullness in your life and heart, you need to hold that feeling in your body instead.

And that’s exactly what we’re going to do. Not to manifest things necessarily, but to generate a fullness in our heart, which is much longer lasting.

However, because this tool is basically a tweak on a manifestation technique, don’t be surprised if things start to show up! But the goal here is to feel the fullness of heart regardless of what you have.

A TWEAK ON MANIFESTATION

For the last 10+ years that I’ve been actively using manifestation, I have always visualized myself achieving or receiving the things I wanted, but it somehow felt… disconnected. Like I was imagining having this thing I wanted, but I was still very aware of the fact I didn’t have it.

And the more things I focused on trying to manifest, the more I felt a strong sense of lack building in my heart and life.

It made me feel frantic, and very unworthy.

Several months ago though, this question popped into my mind:

I know I want these things and think they’re going to make me happy, but I really don’t want to wait to be happy. So what if I was just happy now? How could I do that?

And that’s when I decided to try something new:

I just let myself have what I wanted, now.

That doesn’t mean I went out and bought all the things I wanted — I mean, many of the things I want aren’t even purchasable (i.e. better habits, more happiness, etc).

Instead, I let myself have everything in my heart.

I gave myself permission (which is essentially saying “I am worthy”) one-by-one to have the things, and I held the essence of having them in my heart, as if I already had them.

Instantly I could feel a shift, a relaxation and positivity in my body and thoughts. And taking steps to actually achieve the things suddenly became so much clearer and easier without all the mental gunk!

LET YOURSELF HAVE IT

Now you try:

1. Think of something you want that you either feel unworthy of, or think will solve a problem for you.

2. Think about how badly you want that thing. How it will fix you, your life, or make things easier.

3. Now take a deep breath… And just let yourself have that thing, in your heart. Know it as yours. Not in some future moment, but now!

I mean really, we only ever experience life in the present moment. So who is to say you don’t already have that thing? If there is no past, and no future, only now, let yourself have that thing you want so bad!

WORTHINESS

I think one of the main keys is in letting yourself have the thing.

Because you are worthy of it. Even if you don’t physically have the thing now. Or the money. Or the skills. You are worthy of it.

I mean, that’s what that void is all about, right? A feeling of dis-ease, of incompleteness, unworthiness.

The great thing about it too is that the tool seems to have a cumulative effect. So the more you let yourself have the things you want, in your heart, the more you tell yourself you’re worthy, the more you will chip away at the false belief that there is something wrong with you, that you are lacking or unworthy in some way. And you begin to feel more full and shine more brightly inside and out.

EASY PEASY

This is a super simple tool, but still continues to create profound shifts for me every time I use it. (allll dayyyy longgggg)

One thing I love about it is how fast and simple it is. There’s no sitting down to visualize and really focusing. It can be done on the fly, right when you notice that digging feeling in your chest of lack.

So from now on, when you notice you are feeling inadequate or lacking in some way, let yourself have whatever it is you want, in your heart. Breathe it in. Sit with it a moment, and notice how it changes to have it.

Bonus, you may attract the things you actually do want in your life. Not out of lack and needing, but out of wholeness, worthiness, and fun.

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Let yourself have whatever it is you want, in your heart, my dear.

Allow your heart to have the feeling of the new job, the new house, the box of kittens, of being totally on-it and kicking ass.

You may not physically have those things right now, but really, you don’t need them to be happy. Be happy now. You are so so worthy.

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Let me know in the comments if you found this tool helpful!

All my love,

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